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Clean Blonde Jokes

87 Clean Blonde Jokes
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A brunette, redhead and blonde went to a fitness spa for some fun andrelaxation. After a stimulating healthy lunch, all three decided tovisit the ladies room and found a strange-looking woman sitting at theentrance who said,

"Welcome to the ladies room. Be sure to check out our newestfeature: a mirror which, if you look into it and say something truthful,you will be awarded with a wish. But be warned, for if you say somethingfalse, you will be sucked into the mirror to live in a void ofnothingness for all eternity!"

The three women quickly entered and upon finding the mirror, theBrunette said, "I think I'm the most beautiful of us three" and in aninstant she was surrounded by a pile of money.

The redhead stepped up and said, "I think I'm the most talented of usthree", and she suddenly found the keys to a brand new Lexus in herhands.

Excited over the possibility of having a wish come true, the blondelooked into the mirror and said, "I think..." and was promptly suckedinto the mirror.






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A blonde, wanting to earn some money, decided to hire herself out as a handyman-type and started canvassing a wealthy neighborhood. She went to the front door of the first house and asked the owner if he had any jobs forher to do. "Well, you can paint my porch. How much will you charge?"

The blonde said "How about 50 dollars?" The man agreed and told her that the paint and ladders that she might need were in the garage. The man's wife, inside the house, heard the conversation and said to her husband, "Doesshe realize that the porch goes all the way around the house?"

The man replied, "She should. She was standing on the porch."

A short time later, the blonde came to the door to collect her money.

"You're finished already?" he asked. "Yes," the blonde answered, "and I had paint left over, so I gave it two coats. "Impressed, the man reached in his pocket for the $50. "And by the way," the blonde added, "that's not aPorch, it's a Ferrari."




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There are three blondes stranded on an island. Suddenly, a fairy appears and offers to grant each one of them a wish.T

he first blond asks to be intelligent. Instantly, she is turned into a brown haired woman and swims off the island.

The next one asks to be even more intelligent than the previous one, so instantly she is turned into a black-haired woman. The black-haired woman builds a boat and sails off the island.

The third blonde asks to become even more intelligent than the previous two. The fairy turns her into a man, and he walks across the bridge.


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Last summer, down on Lake Isabella, located in the high desert an hour east of Bakersfield, a blonde, new to boating was having a problem. No matter how hard she tried, she just couldn't get her brand new 22 ft Bayliner to perform. It wouldn't get on a plane at all, and it wasvery sluggish in almost every maneuver, no matter how much power she applied.

After about an hour of trying to make it go, she putted over to a nearby marina. Maybe they could tell her what was wrong. A thorough topside check revealed everything was in perfect working order. The engine ran fine, the outdrive went up and down, and the prop was the correct size and pitch.

So, one of the marina guys jumped in the water to check underneath the boat. He came up choking on water, he was laughing so hard.

Under the boat, still strapped securely in place, was the trailer.


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A blonde decides to try horseback riding, even though she has had no lessons or prior experience. She mounts the horse unassisted and the horse immediately springs into motion.

It gallops along at a steady and rhythmic pace, but the blonde begins to slip from the saddle. In terror, she grabs for the horse's mane, but cannot seem to get a firm grip. She tries to throw her arms around the horse's neck, but she slides down the side of the horse anyway. The horse gallops along, seemingly oblivious to its slipping rider.

Finally, giving up her frail grip, she leaps away from the horse to try and throw herself to safety.

Unfortunately, her foot became entangled in the stirrup and she is now at the mercy of the horse's pounding hooves as her head is struck against the ground again and again.

As her head is battered against the ground, she is mere moments away from unconsciousness when

Frank, the Wal-Mart manager runs out to shut the horse off.


87 Clean Blonde Jokes
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