Why we should feel sorry for tech support people:
A woman called the Canon help desk with a problem with her printer. The tech asked her if she was "running it under Windows." The woman then responded, "No, my desk is next to the door. But that is a good point. The man sitting in the cubicle next to me is under a window, and his is working fine."
Tech Support: "OK Bob, let's press the control and escape keys at thesame time. That brings up a task list in the middle of the screen. Now type the letter 'P' to bring up the Program Manager." Customer: "I don't have a 'P'."Tech Support: "On your keyboard, Bob."Customer: "What do you mean?"Tech Support: "'P' on your keyboard, Bob."Customer: "I'm not going to do that!"
Overheard in a computer shop:Customer: "I'd like a mouse mat, please."Salesperson: "Certainly sir, we've got a large variety."Customer: "But will they be compatible with my computer?"
I once received a fax with a note on the bottom to fax the document backtothe sender when I was finished with it, because he needed to keep it.
Customer: "Can you copy the Internet for me on this diskette?"
I work for a local ISP. Frequently we receive phone calls that startsomething like this:Customer: "Hi. Is this the Internet?"
Some people pay for their online services with checks made payable to"TheInternet."
Customer: "So that'll get me connected to the Internet, right?"Tech Support: "Yeah."Customer: "And that's the latest version of the Internet, right?"Tech Support: "Uhh...uh...uh...yeah."
Tech Support: "All right...now double-click on the File Manager icon."Customer: "That's why I hate this Windows -- because of the icons -- I'maProtestant, and I don't believe in icons."Tech Support: "Well, that's just an industry term sir. I don'tbelieve it was meant to --"Customer: "I don't care about any 'Industry Terms'. I don't believe inicons."Tech Support: "Well...why don't you click on the 'little picture' of afilecabinet...is 'little picture' OK?"Customer: [click]
Customer: "My computer crashed!"Tech Support: "It crashed?"Customer: "Yeah, it won't let me play my game."Tech Support: "All right, hit Control-Alt-Delete to reboot."Customer: "No, it didn't crash -- it crashed."Tech Support: "Huh?"Customer: "I crashed my game. That's what I said before. I crashed myspaceship and now it doesn't work."Tech Support: "Click on 'File,' then 'New Game.'"Customer: [pause] "Wow! How'd you learn how to do that?"