 |
So It Was All An Act?Right... Paris Hilton says she's no longer going to act dumb. If that was acting, give that girl an Oscar because she pulled it off on a Tom Hanks-type level in Castaway. I'm not fascinated with this case. If anything, I'm more fascinated with every one else's fascination with the case. Much like Anna Nicole Smith (was that an act too?) the US, and to some extent the world, have gone loopy over the news from a couple of mindless bimbos. Why, I'll never know. What have they contributed to this world? One posed in magazines without her clothes and the other was in magazines because she could afford as many clothes as she wanted. But as for playing dumb and now being changed, you tell me if the final bit in that article shows she's changed at all: Hilton, who said other inmates had been friendly, added that her skin was very dry because she was not allowed any moisturizer. “It doesn’t matter,” she said, “I’m not that superficial girl. I haven’t looked in the mirror since I got here.” Why even mention your skin if you're not superficial? I surely don't go around telling people my skin's dry because of a lack of moisturizer. My skin's condition usually doesn't even come up during a conversation. My best guess is that she hasn't looked in a mirror because they had them removed so she didn't do something stupid (whether acting or not) because of being stuck in a cell. |
| Look At All You Could Have Done |
A husband and wife are traveling by car from Atlanta to New York. After almost twenty-four hours on the road, they're too tired to continue, and they decide to stop for a rest. They stop at a nice hotel and take a room, but they only plan to sleep for four hours and then get back on the road. When they check out four hours later, the desk clerk hands them a bill for $350. The man explodes and demands to know why the charge is so high. He tells the clerk although it's a nice hotel, the rooms certainly aren't worth $350. When the clerk tells him $350 is the standard rate, the man insists on speaking to the manager. The manager listens to the man and then explains the hotel has an Olympic-sized pool and a huge conference center that were available for the husband and wife to use. He also explains they could have taken in one of the shows for which the hotel is famous. "The best entertainers from New York, Hollywood and Las Vegas perform here," explains the manager. No matter what facility the manager mentions, the man replies, "But we didn't use it!" The manager is unmoved and eventually the man gives up and agrees to pay. He writes a check and gives it to the manager. The manager is surprised when he looks at the check. "But sir," he says, "this check is only made out for $100." "That's right," says the man. "I charged you $250 for sleeping with my wife." "But I didn't!" exclaims the manager. "Well," the man replies, "she was here, and you could have." |
| Sex education |
A fifth grade teacher is told she must teach sex education to her class. She decides to use a math technique to teach the subject, and thinks flash cards will work well. The next day in class, she holds up the first flash card, a picture of a breast, and asked "Does anyone know what this is?" Little Suzie responds-"I know, I know! It's a picture of a breast and my mommy has two of them!" The teacher says "very good Suzie, you get a star for the exercise" The teacher grabs the next card and holds it up. It's a picture of a penis. She asks "Does anyone know what this is?" and little Tommy says, "I know I know! It a penis and my daddy has two of them!!!" The teacher says "well Tommy, It is a penis but your daddy can't have two of them." Tommy says, "sure he does, he's got a little one he pees out of and a great big one he brushes mommy's teeth with!" |
| If you'd like to unsubscribe from EmailAJoke.com, click here |