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Man, I gotta get used to eBay. I just did something bone-headed last night. I bid on an item a couple of days ago and lost the auction. Oh well, it's easy to find another one. So I did. Bid on that and also lost. I'm winning this next one! I put my bid in, and just about the time the auction was supposed to end, I got an e-mail notice stating I had a 2nd-chance to get the item I didn't win. I don't know why, but I thought it was on the most recent item I was trying to win. It wasn't... So now I've got 2 copies of this product on the way. What to do, what to do? Eh, it's a 360 game, so if I can't find a way to get rid of it, maybe I'll have some sort of contest on the site for it. There's gotta be a couple of ya'll out there with a 360, right? |
| The Earless Owner |
Merv was in a terrible accident at work. He fell through a floor tile and ripped off both of his ears. Since he was permanently disfigured, he settled with the company for a rather large sum of money and went on his way. One day, Merv decided to invest his money in a small, but growing internet company. After weeks of negotiations, he bought the company outright. But, after signing on the dotted line he realized that he knew nothing about running such a business and quickly set out to hire someone who could do that for him. The next day he had set up three interviews. The first guy was great. He knew everything he needed to and was very interesting. At the end of the interview, Merv asked him, "Do you notice anything different about me?" And the gentleman answered, "Why yes, I couldn't help but notice you have no ears." Merv got very angry and threw him out. The second interview was with a woman, and she was even better than the first guy. He asked her the same question, "Do you notice anything different about me?" and she replied, "Well, you have no ears." Merv again was upset and tossed her out. The third and last interview was the best of all three. It was with a very young man who was fresh out of college. He was smart. He was handsome and he seemed to be a better businessman than the first two put together. Merv was anxious, but went ahead and asked the young man the same question: "Do you notice anything different about me?" And to his surprise, the young man answered, "Yes. You wear contact lenses." Merv was shocked, and said, "What an incredibly observant young man. How in the world did you know that?" The young man fell off his chair laughing hysterically and replied, "Well, it's pretty damn hard to wear glasses with no ears!" |
| division |
| A 54 year old accountant leaves a letter for his wife one Friday evening that reads: Dear Wife (that's what he called her): I am 54 and by the time you receive this letter I will be at the Grand Hotel with my beautiful and sexy 18 year old secretary. When he arrived at the hotel there was a letter waiting for him that read as follows: Dear Husband (that's what she called him): I too am 54 and by the time you receive this letter I will be at the Breakwater Hotel with my handsome and virile 18 year old toy boy. You being an accountant will therefore appreciate that 18 goes into 54 many more times than 54 goes into 18. |
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